I'm Worried About My Child
BULLYING
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Bullying occurs when a child engages in aggressive behaviour toward another child and can include emotional, verbal or physical abuse. Bullying is much more complex than people often realise; quiet coercion, threats or intimidation are less obvious than kicking a child in the playground – but both forms of bullying are equally damaging. Some children may not even realise they are being bullied – and although they feel frightened, they think they have to play along with the ‘game’ , not realising that this behaviour is abusive .
Bullying can impact many aspects of a child’s life. A child who is being bullied may have trouble focusing on their school work, difficulty sleeping and may miss out on parties, play dates, school trips and other events that the bully might be going to.
Many families who first come to us are resigned to the fact that the bullying will continue in some form or other – and they simply want some coping strategies for their child. Others ask for their child to change class or even move schools in order to escape the bullying.
But there is another way; bullying can be overcome.
Children who engage in bullying are often dubbed as ‘bad’ or ‘troubled’ children. Yet people often forget that the ’bully’ is also in need of support and teaching. Failing to help a child who is being bullied is unacceptable. Failing to provide help and support for the bully is also wrong.
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A child who engages in such inappropriate behaviour with another child deserves to have someone help them learn new and more appropriate ways of interacting with the other children.
Communication is often at the heart of the problem; many children who engage in bullying are simply lacking the appropriate language, communication or socialisation skills – and bullying can be a way of covering up this ‘deficit’.
For others bullying is a way of gaining popularity with certain children, or a way of getting attention (either positive or negative) from adults and children.
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Many parents have tried conventional sanctions (time outs, confiscating toys etc) - and these haven’t worked. Others may be in denial or feel there is nothing they can do to teach their child to behave appropriately.
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Our experience, backed by research advances in the fields of psychology and education, tells us otherwise. Bullying can be overcome – and we would love to equip you and your child with the tools to overcome bullying.
The work we do with you, your child and the school will be entirely confidential. There is no need for any other parents to be involved and, in most cases; your child will not even know we are there for them. In every situation we will be as discreet as we can be, ensuring the rest of the class do not know why we are in the classroom or playground.
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Whether your child is bullied or bullying, strategies can be put in place to give them the skills they require to develop healthy, happy and meaningful friendships.